monkinabus: blog of derek dominguez

The 3000 and 143 million

Two numbers often occupy my thoughts and motivate how I live my life on a daily basis. The numbers fluctuate, but at times there have been reported 3,000 homeless people living in Santa Cruz at any one time. Many of them are single mothers and children. Some of them I've been blessed to personally meet through spending time at the Homeless Service Center here in Santa Cruz or through serving at other organizations in town. There are 143 million orphans around the world. Daily I ask God and ponder how he personally desires me to respond.

As an apprentice to Jesus and walking in the "Way" we can't ignore those in need closest to us, nor can we choose to not acknowledge the plight of how the majority of the world lives. Whether it is a homeless person down the street in need or an orphan on the other side of the world, God desires compassion to manifest itself in and through our lives to both. For if our internal being is truly being shaped into the likeness of Christ himself, I don't know how we can ignore either for they both are need of God's tangible love.

"Are you a follower?"

As I was putting Tate to bed upon my return from Kenya this last July she asked me, "Are you a disciple of Jesus?" A profound question for a five year old. I humbly responded saying "Yes, I do the best I can to learn from and follow Jesus every day." She then asked me if I would continue to teach her how to be a disciple each morning. I can't think of more prestigious honor and privilege as a parent. I'm doing the best I can.

It all started in India...

...well not really, but a particular trajectory of our lives did. God definitely used a trip Meagin and I helped lead in 2001 to India to awaken to us how we would be moved recently to spending our lives for the sake of the marginalized, oppressed, abandoned and orphaned. A number of stories or images from our trip to India have recently occupied my recent thoughts.

I'll never forget Gracie, an abandoned little girl who turned our hearts upside down and who had been rescued from the gutters. Then there is a picture taken by one of our team members while we were in India. I looked at it every day when I had a permanent office to work from. It was taken off a billboard and asked the question, "Have you begun your incredible journey?" I always loved this question, especially as it pertains to our following after Jesus as his apprentices. In one sense, we all are on some type of Journey. As a follower of Jesus we are journeying after Him and yet Jesus is continually asking us to begin once again, into being invited to Journey into The Way. We are on "The Journey," but also continually being invited to go further, to "Journey" deeper.

Up to this point we have been on this incredible "Journey" with Jesus, but recently He is asking us to accept the invitation to begin anew in following and we are now entering into a new season. For the first time in years, as I look at this picture I have peace to be able to say "Yes, it's begun."

In the weeks to come, I'll be blogging about some exciting and significant changes in ministry and a new role I have had the privilege of accepting with World Orphans as the Director of Spiritual Formation. It's exciting times for the Dominguez Clan. I'm still leading and directing Compassion Santa Cruz, but this new role with World Orphans and their mobilization initiative called Journey117, only complements the ministry we are already called to here in Santa Cruz in mobilizing the church for the sake of those in need, the marginalized, oppressed and abandoned. We now have the opportunity to live out this calling, both locally and globally. I'm excited to share with you more in the near future as we say "yes" to being on this incredible Journey with Jesus. More to come....

Distractions

The other day I was a wannabe monk in my bus. I had realized the normal office space I now have to work was being occupied. So, I headed down the street from our house to find a coffee shop. Each one I checked was packed. No sitting space was available. Eventually I found myself parked over looking Sea Cliff Beach. I opened up the side doors of my bus, plopped down on the back    seat, stretched out, and realized days had gone by since I just took a moment to stop.

I spent the next few hours in the back of my bus praying in solitude. It was beautiful. It made me realize how quickly I had become distracted with the busyness of life and the details of getting CompassionSC started. I had slowly slipped into a "hurried" life, continually being distracted from many of the sustaining disciplines I've realized over the years I need, to live a sustainable and whole life.

Dallas Willard once told John Ortberg, "You must ruthlessly eliminate hurry from your life." I've come to realize I also must ruthlessly eliminate distractions. It's so easy for me to get distracted in the midst of living a hurried life. I get drawn into thinking, "There is so much to do. If I don't do it, it won't get done. If it doesn't get done then how is CompassionSC going to continue to grow and flourish." It's all really connected to wanting to succeed in the eyes of others and to be significant. My busy life recently led to having a hurried soul, all fueled by an unhealthy desire to succeed in the eyes of man.

I realized last week as I was a wannabe monk in my bus that I needed to repent of living a hurried life. You can live a busy life and have alot going on, but not have a hurried soul in the midst of it. There is a difference I think. I had become a hurried soul. I'm happy God was gracious enough and patient with me to realize it. He doesn't need me to hurry around trying to do his work. He's already doing it. I just need to remember to stop and be a monk in a bus and to choose the better way like Mary did and not run around like Martha "worried and troubled about many things."

Missional Order: 1.3 The Role of Spiritual Disciplines in Spiritual Formation

Every human is being formed into someone. We are all continually being shaped and undergoing some type of transformation. A follower of Jesus has embarked on a journey to participate in a particular way of transformation. This process of spiritual formation looks to Jesus as its authority and to his way of existing as the means to the "good life," the abundant life God offers to us. A follower of Jesus therefore takes spiritual formation seriously and desires to participate in the "redemptive process" of having their inner being take on the character of Christ himself. As someone on going participates in this process of inner formation, their exterior life naturally flows from the interior. In the previous post in this series, I quoted Dallas Willard's definition in full where he defines Christian Spiritual Formation.

Christian spiritual formation is the redemptive process of forming the inner human world so that it takes on the character of the inner being of Christ himself. In the degree to which it is successful, the outer life of the individual becomes a natural expression or outflow of the character and teachings of Jesus. But the external manifestation of “Christlikeness” is not the focus of the process; and when it is made the main emphasis the process will be defeated, falling into crushing legalisms and parochialisms. “That Christ be formed in you” (Gla. 4:19) is the eternal watchword of Christian spiritual formation, fortified by the assurance that, while “the letter of the law kills, the spirit gives life.” (II Cor. 3:6)

The follower of Jesus is not left alone to embark in this process in some haphazard fashion. God has provided a particular way to go about spiritual formation. He has given to us the Spiritual Disciplines for us to intentionally participate in to provide the space and environment for him to work in our lives. A missional order, formed around a particular set of values and lived out in peculiar practices reflecting those values, must also be active participants in the spiritual disciplines to be formed into the image of Christ. Members of an order must draw upon the resources of the disciplines, those practices deeply rooted in the history of God's people as providing the space for God to work.

God desires the total transformation of our whole person and the disciplines have been given to us to assist us. Richard Foster states in his book Celebration of Discipline, "“The purpose of the Spiritual Disciplines is the total transformation of the person"(62). God is the one who does the transformation and it is only by his grace, but we have to be intentional about it. The disciplines as we practice them are the means by which we undergo our transformation. Again, in closing Foster states, "God has given us the disciplines of the spiritual life as a means of receiving his grace. The Disciplines allow us to place ourselves before God so that he can transform us” (7).

Spiritual Formation and Vocation (Pt. 5):Taking Pleasure in Our Calling

If we believe we have been created to live out a "life" only we were created to live, then when we discover our vocation it should bring us some sense of pleasure and satisfaction. A beautiful example of this is my mother. This last June she retired from teaching after faithfully serving for 39 years. As long as I can remember she has been a teacher. Now after retiring, she is still vocationally a teacher even though she is no longer paid to do it. What sticks out to me is the joy and pleasure my mother took in teaching 2nd and 3rd graders over the years. She absolutely loved it and when I saw her doing it in the classroom, you could just tell she was in a vocation she was created to be living out. She was born a teacher. She has lived out being a teacher to literally hundreds and hundreds of students over the years. She will forever be a teacher.

I've talked to many people who seem to have just settled or have given up on searching for what they were created to do. This is different than someone who knows their vocation and is working a job, but in their "off" hours is still living out their calling. It looks different for each person. I’ve been blessed to see someone close to me discover and live out their vocation.

I don't know how intentional my mother was in discovering her vocation since she started teaching at such a young age. Maybe her calling actually found her. Either way we were created to enjoy our calling, to work hard at it and to take pleasure in living out what we were created to do. I've learned from the example of my mother to not settle, but to continue on the adventure of discovery. As mentioned previously in earlier posts in this series, the educational system in North America doesn't assist young people in this process and for that matter neither does the church.

Vocation and Spiritual Formation (part 4): Listening to the Call of Our Vocation

In the last post Parker Palmer stated our vocation is "a gift to be received" and "accepted." But, before we can receive, discover, and accept our vocation there must be discernment and listening to what our “life” is trying to tell us. Without the willingness to listen to the "voice" of our true self speaking forth who we are, we run after other things, pulling us away from our true vocation.

 "Vocation does not mean a goal I pursue. It means a calling that I hear. Before I can tell my life what I want to do with it, I must listen to my life telling me who I am. I must listen for the truths and values at the heart of my own identity, not the standards by which I must live - but the standards by which I cannot help but live if I am living my own life." ~ Parker Palmer

I long to be living my own life, not the life others project and put forth for me to live. The life only meant to be living in me. Our culture likes cookie cutter identities. We are threatened by those who cry from the depths, “You can’t box me in. You can’t form me in your own image.” I am pursuing to live the “good life,” to be living by the standards by which I cannot but live if “I’m living my own life.” Who’s life are you living? Is it the life God intended you to live or some other fabrication and false self built on a foundation of shifting sand?

Vocation and Spiritual Formation (Pt. 3): What is vocation?

This post builds upon posts one and two. In the last post we ended with a key idea regarding vocation and spiritual formation. There are two haunting questions every person asks and Parker Palmer phrases them as, "What am I meant to do with my life?" and "Who am I meant to be?" As discussed previously, it is difficult and strenuous for anyone to answer these questions authentically without first understanding the depth of how God sees us.
    When asking these questions we must begin with understanding how God sees us at the core of our identity and then move on towards celebrating the beautiful creation we are in him. We then can freely discover who he has made us to be. Vocation in this sense is a gift given to us by God. A unique gift to be received, embraced, and lived out.

"Today I understand vocation quite differently - not as a goal to be achieved but a as gift to be received. Discovering vocation does not mean scrambling toward some prize just beyond my reach but accepting the treasure of true self I already possess. Vocation does not come from a voice 'out there' calling me to become something I am not. It comes from a voice 'in here' calling me to be the person I was born to be, to fulfill the original self hood given me at birth by God."~Parker Palmer

    Often times I think my vocation and "calling" is something I have to work harder at to be, as if it is something I have to attain beyond myself. It does take intentionality to discover and to find, but I already possess "it" as a gift from God, as my birthright. What a relief and joy it is to embrace who we already are, instead of striving to be someone we're not.

Vocation and Spiritual Formation (part 2): Listening to Who We Are

    I ended the last post on Spiritual Formation and Vocation with a question posed by Parker Palmer. "Is the life I am living the life that wants to live in me?" How can someone answer this without first answering, "What is the life that wants to live in me?" As a beautiful creation of God himself, what is the life he has specifically given to me to live out? Not the life he has given to "so and so." Not the life I think others want me to live in order to please them, but the life he has given to me? The life he "sewed together in the depths of the earth" and intended only me to live out? This is one of the hardest questions of our existence if we are brave enough to ask it and seek an answer.    
    We grow up in a world pushing us to pursue "identities" God himself never intended us to run after. Many of them are harmful to our formation. Instead of boldly learning to listen to the whisper of our true calling we give in to the booming and relentless voices of others telling us we need to be formed and trust what others think of us, what we can achieve or do, and what we possess. If we listen to these “voices” it is very difficult to ever listen to the still quiet whisper of God himself, telling us to receive the gift of our true vocation.
    We cannot truthfully answer these questions being posed about vocation until we comprehend first and foremost how God sees us. We are unable to hear the whisper of our own vocation telling us who we are meant to be and how we are meant to live in this world, unless we first hear the quiet still voice of God himself, revealing the most intimate truth about us. Henri Nouwen says it like this in his work Life of the Beloved.

Yes, there is that voice, the voice that speaks from above and from within that whispers softly or declares loudly: ‘You are my beloved, on you my favor rests.’ It certainly is not easy to hear that voice in  a  world filled with voices that shout: ‘You are no good, you are ugly; you are worthless; you are despicable, you are nobody – unless you can demonstrate the opposite.’ These negative voices are so loud and so persistent that it is easy to believe them.

These are the voices drawing us away from hearing what God has to say about us and therefore away from hearing and discerning what our true vocation is. Until we hear the voice of God and claim the truth about who we are and how dearly we are loved, we will run to and fro, chasing dreams and a life we were never intended to live. Until we can hear the voice of God himself, telling us we are the beloved, we will never find the answer to the questions, “Who am I meant to be? What am I meant to do?”

Vocation and Spiritual Formation (Part One)

At the beginning of this last academic year with the college students, I began a process of asking them a series of questions focusing on spiritual formation and vocation. I firmly believe the two are inextricably tied together. As the academic year came to a finale I found myself pondering significantly the questions I had been asking the students.
    We used the lyrics of Switchfoot's song, "This Is Your Life" from their popular album "The Beautiful Letdown," as a starting point for asking the question, "Are you who you want to be?"

    "this is your life, are you who you want to be
    this is your life, are you who you want to be
    this is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be
    when the world was younger and you had everything to lose"

I'm not sure what Switchfoot intended their hearers to question with these lyrics, but for me they raise up the same questions Parker Palmer asks in his book Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation. In his book in the first few pages he poses the questions, "What am I meant to do? Who am I meant to be?” Asking the question, "Am I who I want to be?" assumes we know who it is we're supposed to be. As a follower of Jesus this raises another question, "Who is it God desires me to be?" Or, to ask it another way, "Who is it God has created me to be?
    As I've chatted with people of all ages I've come to the realization most people don't have the answers to these questions. They think they do or they have lived the life they think they are supposed to be living, but it may not be the life they were given to live. Our culture and society fails at assisting young people to understand the answers to these basic existential questions. In my estimation the church falls just as short in helping our young people answer them too. Many are left wondering, without any guidance, if "the life am living is really the life that wants to live in me."